"Precept must be upon precept, precept upon precept, line upon line, line upon line, here a little and there a little." Isaiah 28:10
"Precept must be upon precept, precept upon precept, line upon line, line upon line, here a little and there a little." Isaiah 28:10
For a long time I have been struggling with a specific material claim. Sometimes, without any warning, it seems to wash into my thought “out of left field,” as Fenella used to say. I have often struggled with a feeling of shame and guilt as mortal mind claims I have given in.
A while ago, desiring to be completely honest about this challenge, I asked Fenella whether I should resign from the Association until the whole thing had lifted. “Absolutely not!” she said, “you’re in it for life, my girl, and Association is where you need to be right now!” I then asked her whether I should resign from my branch church. Fenella wisely said nothing at all. She just listened while I reasoned out loud. The answer came. How could my resignation help my church or me? As Clerk to the Board my duty was to carry on.
Although I felt comforted at that time, the feeling of guilt has persisted. I mentally struggle to see that my true gravitation is to God, not downwards into temptation.
During a sleepless night last month, I cried out, “I can of mine own self do nothing!” I saw that mere human effort would not meet the case. I had to “let go and let God,” as a dear friend once said. Drying my tears, I lay quietly in the darkness and whispered: “I’m listening, God.” It was a Samuel moment!
Then an angel message came. “Think lessof the enactmentsof mortal mind.” Yes! I had to stop thinking that I was failing God, and instead concentrate my thought on how to be more Godlike. A helpful analogy also came to me. I thought about how many Americans enjoy re-enactmentsof Civil War battles. The realistic weapons can’t hurt them and, afterwards, they go home unscathed, knowing they are only acting a part. Wow! The angel thought freed me from the burden of guilt. It really was a taste of heaven.
I had no idea where the statement about “the enactments of mortal mind” came from, but it sounded like a quote from Science and Health. Another angel message told me that there was no need to look it up; I could benefit from it right then, without needing to know chapter and verse.
A few weeks later my angel message was included in the Lesson-Sermon. I discovered that it was only part of the sentence that reads: “Think less of the enactments of mortal mind, and you will sooner grasp man’s God-given dominion.” (Science and Health 381:20 – 21).
I’m known in my church for constantly looking up dictionary definitions of ordinary words. The meaning of ‘grasp’ reads to say “sieze, accept eagerly, hold firmly; mental hold.” I saw I had to sieze the day, to make my efforts count, and to let go of the night, the mental darkness of fear, guilt, and shame.
The very next citation in that same Lesson-Sermon really convinced me of this truth. It said, “It is man’s moral right to annul an unjust sentence, a sentence never inflicted by divine authority.” (Science and Health 381:28). ‘Annul’ means to “abolish, cancel, declare (assert emphatically) invalid.” I have the right to be free, and to fight for my freedom!
Remember that discouragement is the Devil’s tool? Well, it can’t enter a grateful heart. So, when I am tempted to feel discouraged, I literally count my blessings and say out loud what I am grateful for. ‘Gratitude’ is defined in the dictionary as “Being thankful for and ready to return kindness.” That’s my job, to reach out and be kind to others.
Things are improving. It’s a work in progress, not an immediate lifting of the claim, but I am lighter in heart and full of hope. Each battle won is a victory.