Howbeit, there is a kinsman nearer than I Ruth 3:12

I have had many healings this year for which I am very grateful.  However, the healing that was a "watershed" for many subsequent healings was the healing which taught me how to pray better for "adult" children by understanding more about true Love.

Over the years I have felt overwhelmed by a multitude of concerns, questions, and personal responsibility concerning parenting.  I believed with the world that a lack of or overabundance of love can produce "dysfunctional" humans.  I also felt that love had to come from me personally.  That made it difficult when I didn't "feel" loving - for whatever reason.

In Christian Science, I have been learning something different: that GOD is the parent.  In fact, the compound term "Father-Mother" is used to describe God.  Furthermore, Christian Science teaches that God is the ONLY parent and not only wants good for His-Her child, but IS good.  I have also been learning that this "parent" God IS Love; that Love is not a quality of God but His-Her ESSENCE; and that divine Love is infinite, all-powerful so no power can withstand it; that Love governs the universe, understands its creation, knows what it needs, and so gives to each of its children wisely and unstintingly. 

How does this apply to "adult" children - children who are no longer under our roof?  I find one of my favorite citations helpful: "Be not afraid nor dismayed by reason of this great multitude; for the battle is not yours but God's...Set yourselves, stand ye still and see the salvation of the Lord..." (II Chron 20:15).  In other words: God's job is to heal.  Our job is to call on and witness this power.

Knowing and fulfilling my part culminated in a very precious healing for me.  I was confronted with a family situation that was very disturbing, especially since it was occurring many states away and I still believed I needed to be present to help resolve it.  As a result of my human maneuvering, I alienated the parties involved to the extent that they were  no longer in contact with me despite my phone calls and letters.  I was heartbroken and became sick. 

Working with the material elements of the situation (like anger, resentment, etc.) afforded no relief.  Finally, I realized that I had missed the mark.  I was the one that needed comforting, and longed to feel the arms of my parent, Father-Mother God, around ME.  So I worked to draw closer to God, Love.  The thought slowly came to me that it was not my problem.  MY job was to bear witness to God’s power and glory and love, and to turn things over mentally to God, who was in charge any way.  I finally felt peace about the situation.  I was no longer impelled to be drawn into the conflict.  And I didn't feel negligent or guilty about it.

One day I was sitting at my computer working on emails when a thought came to me to email one person involved in the situation.  Hurtful emails had been part of the conflict and I thought a loving email might act as a counterpoise.  But I didn't know what to say.  So I wrote: "I love you."  That's all I wrote.  The next day I received a very sweet reply.  Since then things have improved greatly.  While this situation is a "work in progress" and I do not know how it will be resolved humanly, worry does not consume me any more. I further realized that God was definitely the healer, as a well-known hymn states:

"Thy love, not mine, bids fear and doubt depart,

And stills the tumult of my troubled breast."  

As much as we love family and want to help (and maybe even control a little), it is important to realize where the real power and Love lie; that there is in Truth "a kinsman nearer than I." Ruth 3:12