The Cornerstone of Our House Is Forgiveness

This year we realised a long held ambition to move to the New Forest. We felt that we had been guided to this house after searching for a couple of years.

The last thing to take place our family house was the marriage of our daughter. As we were waiting in the queue at Marks and Spencers to collect the wedding cake, my husband picked up a magazine which fell open at an advert for an ‘eco house’ just being built in the New Forest. When we visited it we were inspired by the vision of the architect who was building it as a personal project and a prototype for several more he was planning.

We were allowed a great deal of input into the project as it progressed, and a relationship of trust was built between us. Sadly, unbeknown to us, this dear man was having a problem with alcohol.  He lost his family, and became involved with one of his employees. To put it mildly, he was not concentrating. The builder he was in partnership went bankrupt, and a great deal of their joint investment capital disappeared.

Eventually we were due to move in just the week before Christmas. At the last site visit there was still a lot to do, and we were concerned.  The architect promised faithfully that he was throwing lots of men at the job and it would be finished on time.  When we arrived, it is no exaggeration to say that there were clods of mud on the floors still. The heating was not working, there was no hot water, but thankfully there was a wood burning stove.  The shed, greenhouse and conservatory were not ready, and the contents destined for those rooms had to go in the house which strongly resembled auction rooms. And seven people were coming for Christmas!

So much was unfinished that at the time of writing, after Easter, we still have workmen in the house.  When we suggested witholding money until the house was completed, the architect’s lawyers threatened us with eviction. We felt a total betrayal of the trust we felt we had had.  In time it became apparent that this man was on the verge of bankruptcy, and then we could understand his behaviour. However we have had to pay to finish this house ourselves, and we have struggled with our feelings.

What has helped me, and I think my husband who is not a Christian Scientist, is a thought that was shared with me quite early on.  A visitor to my church had heard about our move and enquired about it, whereupon I had a good old whinge. She was having none of it, and very firmly said, "No, you do not live in a disrupted environment, you live in a harmonious environment."  I am so grateful for those words!  They just enabled me to lift myself up out of the mire and start to think spiritually. The thought that came to me over the next day or so was "cornerstone." Then it came to me that the most wonderful cornerstone for a new home and a new life is forgiveness.  I shared that thought with my husband, and forgiveness has been our cornerstone ever since.

Many blessings have come to us since our move. We discovered that many of the tradesmen working on site were so determined to finish the house for us that they had gone into personal debt buying materials.  Two men with young families had not been paid for a couple of weeks, but kept on working.  The site manager, a veteran of many far bigger projects than our little house, told us that he had never worked on a project where the customer was let down.  He said, "Not on my watch!" and has continued to manage the project for no pay for the last couple of months. 

We have had to finish the house at our own expense, reimbursing all these very good men, but undergirding it all has been the cornerstone of forgiveness.   We have been told that our architect is really a good man, and does wish to honour his business commitments. I feel that the end of this story has sill to be unfold.  Several of these workers have remarked how calm we are in the circumstances, and we have been. The house still feels right for us, and we are enjoying it immensely. And it has the strongest kind of foundation of all.